Wednesday, October 19, 2011

But What About the Bicycles?

You Have Got To Be Kidding
Last week I was thinking that maybe on my Booger I should try to be a little more Socially Conscious and stick in some Politics, or a Statement or somehow otherwise do something except pretend that I am happy about being poor and living in a Crappy Trailer Park and being old and slow. Maybe I owe it to somebody somewhere to stick my two cents in (if I had two cents but believe it or not, I don't). But I have two beers (part of what happened to the two cents) and maybe enough energy to Rant a Little so here goes. My Booger is about Evocation of Mood, it is about Encouraging Others to Ride Their Bikes and it is about being  Grateful for What You Have by showing everyone what little I have and how happy I am about it.

But What If
And I am happy about it, pretty much. But what if things get worse? What happens when you go to the ATM and it says Go Fuck Yourself and so you go around to the bank doors and they are locked? Or you head over to the grocery store and those doors are locked too?


So you join a bunch of other people and go down to City Hall to say Hey! We need money and we need food or we will huff and puff and blow City Hall down. But they just call in the Fire Department and the Police (two groups who have jobs and plan to keep them). They hose you down and arrest a few of you and tase a couple of you and then everybody goes home to dry off, calm down and get some rest.

There's Got To Be A Morning After...Maybe
Then when you wake up in the morning the electricity is turned off and you think to yourself “That's odd” must be a transformer or something so you decide to take a shower and get dressed and then go outside to see what's what. But when you get to the shower you discover that the water is off, too.
Uh Oh
What the Hell, you think and you decide to go next door to check with your neighbor. When you step outside you are surprised to see all your neighbors milling around out there in their bathrobes and bunny-rabbit slippers looking like they need to shave and brush their teeth and looking like they damn sure need a cup of coffee but they can't, they can't do any of those things and you can't either.

Can't happen here, you say? Why not? Says who?

Cold Hard Truth
All of the suppliers of these suddenly missing things, these Banks and Water and Food and Electricity, are provided to you by who? Let's say it together:

Corporations. Really Big Corporations.

Bring In the Clowns
So right now there are a bunch of people standing around various City Centers in various cities needing a shave and needing to brush their teeth but apparently having already had way too much coffee.

Trailer Park Manifesto
The Official Trailer Park Policy on OCCUPY is this:

We're for them. 

 I like it. If I wasn't Professionally Poor Me and Uncle Bill would be out there cooking huge piles of Barbecue for them and bringing them Kegs of Beer and trying to sell them sauce. Listen up, gang, whatever those nuts are doing out there OCCUPYING they are doing SOMETHING. They're out there in the rain and the weather Raising Hell and getting arrested and doing something else: They are getting National Attention and they are on our side, they are for us, the Human Beans.

They are for Us, the People. Will the world change due to their antics? It already has. This is one of those god-awful election years and these blow-hards running for the Right To Steal the Most Money In the World will have to answer to the OWS crew in one way or the other. The only thing those so called leaders respect more than Filthy Lucre is POLLS. This Blog here at the Trailer Park is a Poll.  So go ahead and spit it out.  What do you guys think?  Don't worry,  I'll still send you some Sauce.  Speak your minds.


Coming Up Next: The Trailer Park Cyclist Explains God, the Meaning of Life, and How to Maintain a Steady Cadence.. All surprisingly related.

Whispering Pines Trailer Park and Bully Pulpit


  1. God, the Meaning of Life, and How to Maintain a Steady Cadence? I can hardly wait. Hurry!

  2. I am for them and I think the attention they bring to the issue of greed and lack of accountability is a good thing but I believe the only thing that corporations truly understand is profit so until people start voting with their dollars nothing will materially change. I think one thing the occupy folks can do is bring to light which corporations are using loopholes to get out paying taxes, using slave labor abroad, charging outrageous fees etc and then let people use their pocketbooks to let their voices be heard. Ok that hurt my brain man, looking forward to hearing about the cadence thing ;-)

  3. Hell. Yes.

    Way to go, TJ. Keep writing. We'll keep reading.

  4. Atlantya: Yes! Go to and give me a hard mail destination. You won't be sorry!

  5. I'm for the occupation. After all, they made their money from US. Don't the screwed at least deserve to complain?

    Liked your latest post over on FatCyclist, too TJ. You touch a nerve - something about realism maybe. I continue to send any spare good karma in your direction.

    Ride on.

    Steve Z

  6. Hey Steve Z: would you consider writing a guest post? You seem to be a loyal follower and listen, man, EVERYBODY has something to say. It would be a Trailer Park Honor to hear your voice. You can e-mail me at

    Get yourself out there! These guys are easy and friendly. Rock and Roll!

  7. Hey Tim,

    Thanks for writing. I'm sure many of us would like to but can't figure out how/where to start....or just won't take the time to do it (kind of weird if I consider the amount of time I spend reading all these blogs!).

    Anyway. The second fatty post was real good, just like are all the ones on here. I started following shortly after your first fatty post and catched up on all the posts. Good stuff man.

    Keep on posting I really like your writing.

    The Lobster

  8. just read the post on FC. email me @ - i want to here some more about this bill sauce. :0) xo.

  9. In a lot of ways, I envy the Occupiers. Instead of yet another meaningless email chain letter or useless internet rant, they're going with their gut and rolling the dice. From small beginnings, amazing things emerge...